LAME

So I got on to blog this afternoon and started to read other people's blogs. This is when I realized how lame I am. Tara had posted about her trip to Denver, Morgan had an account of her epic skydiving trip, and Alix wrote about going to the beach and other awesome things in California. Maybe I'll blog about the smelly guy I sat by at the movies last night another time...or never.

"Hey, you know what, I've gotta go on that 'Letterman Show.' That show is so lame." -Al Gore

Best Buy

I think that I don't get out enough in Tucson. Reason being, every time I come home to Gilbert, running errands with my parents is one of my favorite things to do. Sadly, going to Target, Sam's Club, and Wal-mart excites me; and my mother rolls her at me throughout the whole experience. Today, my dad needed some cord with ends that we didn't have in the massive box of cords in the office. Of course I volunteered with more enthusiasm than necessary to go to Best Buy with him. While we were there, he couldn't find it. Although I suggested plenty of cords that looked cordy enough for our needs, they were never THE ONE. My dad found a salesperson while I messed around with a touchscreen printer that I accidentally made print and completely embarrassed myself with. As I caught up with my dad, he was talking to the hottest man/salesperson/homosapien I had ever lain eyes upon. Seriously, I could barely stop staring. I could go into detail of his perfectly bronzed skin, chiseled chin, light blue eyes, and wonderfully tousled sandy blonde hair; but I won't. As we were walking out of the store, my dad said to me, "He was attractive wasn't he?" My dad has good taste in men.

"It is better to be beautiful than to be good, but it is better to be good than to be ugly." -Oscar Wilde

Roads

Here I am, sitting on the bottom bunk of the bunk-bed that my sister and I share when I come home, pondering about life. The past few weeks for me have been a period of soul searching, yoga doing, and horoscope reading, to finally figuring out that proverbial road in life that I am supposed to take. I remember my freshman year, reading Robert Frost's poem about taking roads and making decisions, that everyone reads at some point during their high school career. Mr. Frost, my only criticism is that there are so many roads other than that initial starting crossroad. I might have started with one road but then that road lead to another road with an infinite number of intersections that I have had to consider. It's a freaking pain in the...butt. I watched the movie Eat Pray, Love the other day, and other than being a horrible movie, I found myself relating to the astounding Julia Roberts. No, I am not going to be leaving my husband, but I needed a change in my life. Well my friends, accounting is no longer my future, and the sky is already bluer and the birds are chirping. I can't get away from what I love any longer. English it will be and I am dang excited for once in a long while. Moral of the story: Life is too short not to do what will make you happy. I am excited to do what will make me happy.

"Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful." -Albert Schweitzer

Unfun

Well folks, it's that time of year again when I have time to blog. I decided to come home and grace my family with my presence for a week or so. My sister told me I looked fat. I do love her. I'd like to take a minute and reflect on this past semester. I will hereby be labeling this past semester as the UNFUN semester of my college career. A lot of things exploded in my face, and I feel like I did not accomplish as much as I would have liked. I'll have to spend this summer catching up and restarting. I guess that's life, living and learning the hard way. Oi. How is that for a depressing blog post eh?

"Success is simply a matter of luck, ask any failure." -Earl Wilson

Buckets

I haven't blogged in a while. Actually, I never blog but every time that I do, I wish I did it more-like flossing my teeth. Today we were at my aunt's house in California and she has the most darling two year old. At one point, my dad pointed to her and said, "Just a few more years and you'll have one like this Amy." Just a few more years?! Yeah like ten! Another example. On my birthday a few weeks ago my mom said to me, "You're 20, I was married when I was 20." Hey no pressure right? I guess living for two decades means you have to either be having children or have won the Nobel Peace Prize. Here is a list of things I'd like to do in my 20's...and in life.

1. Hike Mount Kilimanjaro
2. Sky Dive (really cliche but I had to put that one on there)
3. Surf
4. GRADUATE (this should be number one)
5. Work for Disney
6. Learn a new language and live in that country
7. Open my own business
8. Go to Cal State Fullerton
9. Move to Chicago
10. Own a car
11. Read more books
12. Get my piano performance degree
13. Write for a newspaper
14. Backpack through Europe (again, cliche but it must be done)
15. Teach Economics
16. Hot air balloon
17. Go to Canada
18. Learn how to take decent pictures
19. Snowboard in Austria
20. Be in Time's Square on New Year's Eve

"Life is a ticket to the greatest show on earth."
-Martin H. Fischer

Liars

I think that they need to change the wording of the ninth commandment. My whole life i have been taught that some guy named Moses went up on a mountain, and came down with a slab of rock that outlined rules that have revolutionized the course of religious history. I guess that's pretty cool i just have one problem; the average male cannot interpret the meaning of the ninth one on there. THOU SHALT NOT BEAR FALSE WITNESS. If I ever talk to God face to face we are going to have a long conversation on why he didn't simply make this one say, "thou shalt not lie." It truly would've made my life much easier.

Although, to all you liars, thieves, cheaters, and politicians out there, I give you credit. The art of lying is a skill that people with morals can never master. Plus, I can't blame you, the ninth commandment is hard to understand. So please, go ahead and keep pretending to be someone you're not. You definitely have me fooled.

"A lie has speed, but truth has endurance." -Edgar J. Mohn

Schooled

After an uneventful summer in Gilbert, Tucson, aka the dirty T, the 520 has welcomed me back with open arms. As much as I loved taking a summer vacation in a town comparable to the one on the Stepford wives, with its perfectly manicured lawns managed by people from a Southern region of this continent, the homeless and trashed streets of Tucson looked like the Garden of Eden to me when I arrived here a week ago. To commemorate my love for this ghetto of a city i have composed a list of the things I love most about it, and the UofA in particualar.

1. Sorority Girl Talk: College campuses are supposed to be places of intellectual theorization along with the formation of new ideas and profound discourse. Today I heard this conversation coming from a group of bleach blonde Alpha Phi's that went something like this....

Girl 1: OMG it's sooooo hot.

Girl 2: I know right? I'm like sweating....

..............20 second pause......................

Girl 1: The guy at Starbucks drew a shooting star on my latte cup this morning.

Girl 2: That's soooo awesome.

Shoot. Me. Now.

2. I love starting my mornings off at the gym with my gay friend Johann. His shorts are much shorter than mine and he sings Lady Gaga with more flair than I ever could. Rock on Johann.

3. Tucson probably has worse streets than any third world country. For some reason, the city decided that rain gutters weren't a necessity. However, when monsoon season comes along it makes for some awesome puddles to jump in! These puddles that are as wide as the street and about 2 feet deep make for prime splashing material to drive through and ruin any Sorostitutes hair day.

4. Egee's. I think that says it all but I'll go further. If you want the best slushy and sub of your life in a tacky bright green and yellow atmosphere, this is the place for you.

5. Riding my beach cruiser Vanilla Pudding around town and getting called "Baby" by a truck full of fat black men. Actually, this probably isn't one of my favorites part about Tucson but it happened today and it was such a confidence booster...not.

6. Living in an apartment that has metal bars on all the windows like a jail cell. Normally I would be repulsed by the idea, but I view this as an asset to the apartment that could help its resale value. I can see the ad now, "2 bed, 1 bath, washer and dryer and metal prison bars on all windows." I do sleep better at night considering even I could break in with these type of windows if it weren't for the bars.

7. Not having to live with my parents!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

"Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education."

-Mark Twain